Guns and Roses

A few pictures from Christmas.  He didn't give me many details, except that some of them are of them messing around and quite funny.  

Dear Mom,

If you gave away a name tag do you need to order a few more? I had already ordered two more name tags so I gave her one of 4.

Have you had any further contact with the less active member you visited last Sunday? Is her husband a member as well?  Does he mind you visiting her? We have had some contact with her, and we are visiting her tomorrow.  Her husband is a non-member, so that in the future may open doors, but we are really focusing on her right now. He has not objected, but I am not sure if he really likes it. So I am hoping all goes well there.

I saw on your Facebook a picture of the Ramirez family and wondered if their little girls are they twins? Will they be going to the temple before transfers?  Will you be able to go? They are an amazing family, they do have twins. Erika and Milly, although Erika doesn't really like missionaries for some reason haha it is kind of funny. Mateo is their little boy and he is awesome!! He likes me so that is always fun. They are going to the temple on the 14th of February so most likely I will be going with them! So I am way excited for that!

Women mom, I do not know how your species thrives... I wanted to edit this out, but I just couldn’t, it was such a funny statement.  He said this in response to a story I told him. So you get a random sentence that means nothing to you but shows his funny side. 

We tried a new thing this weekend, crispy cheese circles.  Basically think pieces of baked cheese.  It was yummy we dipped it in soup.  I think you would love it.  I would probably just eat the crispy cheese and ditch the soup, I mean come on mom, let’s get real here. I eat cheese off the block. I am so down if you make those for when I get home. Also, try nachos with Doritos... all I can say is heart attacking awesomness!!

How are you feeling this past week since you finished the meds?  How is your weight? I have been pretty good this past week. Feeling decent, this morning I wasn't feeling that good, so hopefully that keeps going away. I am not sure about my weight... I haven't weighed myself in a long time. I will have to see one of these days. So I think things are good with that.

Are you staying busy?  I know you are struggling to find people to teach.  How are things? Staying busy, we are doing that, sometimes it is just with studies, but we do our best, and we try to improve where we are lacking. We have found a few new people. Judy, I am not sure if I told you about her, and another Rodriguez family is a referral we got that we hope to contact here soon. I have not gotten too discouraged, it is hard sometimes to stay on key and focused when results are few, but we will go on. Many times this happens in our lives I think, so it is a good prep, plus helps me become stronger.    

How is your companion?  Still doing well?  His training is almost over and he will be moving on?  Do you feel you have trained him well? I think he is adjusting well. I have been sure to really take it slow with him and try and do my best. He is a good person, and has a good heart. I know he will do well if he keeps it up. The hard part comes in about six months it seems. Yea I will finish training him on the 24th of Feb. So hopefully we can finish out strong and keep on going. After that I will only have 3 transfers left in the mission... I do not like that thought. I have really enjoyed serving with him, I think we will be friends after the mission, although that will still be a long ways off for him. He is a good missionary and he can do what the Lord needs of him, even if it seems a little hard at times. I have faith in him. I just hope I have done all I can to help him on the journey when all is said and done... I am not perfect, and both he and I know that, but as long as we try our best, we cannot ask more. Oh before I move on, a funny thing about my companion, he consumes more coke, mountain dew, and cereal than anyone I have ever met I think haha. I always give him a hard time for it.

Do you still do the food truck service project? We do, but this last time we could not go because we had lessons and other things to do.  So hopefully this next month we can. 

How was church this week? Church was good, still weird to get out at 5 p.m. Funny story, I had some fruit snacks in my bag, and little Mateo was wandering about the other week. So I whipped them out and all I had to do was crinkle the bag and he came running, haha he is awesome!

It’s your 21^st Birthday in a few weeks. Do you want/need anything specific for your birthday?  I know I am getting freaking old!! 21 that just sounds kind of depressing.... oh well, another one bites the dust. As far as anything for my birthday... I am not sure right now, I will think about it over this next week and email any ideas next week.

So stories of the week. One that makes me chuckle is the fact that my compo really likes heavy metal music, which I do not. Although, I do like classic rock, so we catch ourselves singing songs every once in a while. Lately it has been some Guns n' Roses and a few by Queen, and other hits of the 80's and that time period hahaha. Probably not appropriate for missionaries huh.

One fun story is we have been hanging out with a member named Eddie he is 32 single and a bro! We are helping him with some things, but we also just have fun and share stories and such. It is awesome. We actually had an amazingly spiritual lesson with him the other day. It also is what my spiritual thought will be on today.

So as far as the spiritual thought goes. I have been thinking a lot about different choices we make, some good, some bad, some stupid and some awesome. Whatever the choice is, we have to live by the consequences. We are to try our best in all we can, including making decisions. We make decisions for different reasons. Although I want to talk about how we can be happy with the decision we have made. Sometimes we make stupid decisions. (Sadly these are some of my funniest and fondest memories). Men are that they might have Joy right. So we are to keep working even when we make a bad decision. I have learned that at times we may mess up, and that stinks honestly, but it is okay. Live with the decision you made, be happy that you have the opportunity to learn from it and improve. Now of course that doesn't mean throwing your life away and run around screaming I am improving.... One you would make a fool of yourself, and two, would probably end up in some every bad situation. I remember a time once when I had to make a huge decision. I couldn't sleep, couldn't eat or anything. I remember some council I received from a few different people, one, being Dad, who has always known what to say to help me along. When it comes to big decisions in our lives we have to be happy with whatever choice we make, for if we are not happy in the choice, how can we be happy with the actions that follow. I am a firm believer that we are free to act for ourselves, and that it is one of God's greatest gifts to us. In life we are dealt and hand and we can only choose how to play the cards. The nice thing is if you try your best even if you fail, you always seem to get another set of cards. I know that through our choices we can truly be happy, or we can truly be miserable. We make ourselves who we wish to be. A man is built by the forges of internal character and choice, not the external forces of our circumstances. I have found this to be true in my life. Also that the only one who can judge how you have lived your life is you. Those who mock and scorn have not lived it, and they may never experience something like it. Although there is one who did. He knows us perfectly, because I believe He lived our lives, every possible outcome there could be. I am not the smartest, or the bravest, or the best looking (definitely not that one). But there are some things I know and one I wish to express is that the Atonement of Jesus Christ was wrought for YOU!!!!!! Yes you not the dude next to you. It is for me as well, I struggle to remember that sometimes. As we all do I feel. Sometimes we see how our decisions determine our future, but we forget that it is all of them, the bad and the good, that determine who we are as people. This is determined now, we must look inside ourselves at times and judge who we are, at that moment, not thinking yesterday I did this or tomorrow I will do this. But who we are now, and if it isn't who we want to be, and then change, that is the beauty of it all. Decisions determine who we are, not just where we are going.

Well I must get going; we are having a FHE tonight with some members. I hope that these letters help someone, and if not, well, at least they have helped me in writing down my thoughts. Well I love you so much and hope you have an amazing week! Thank you for your prayers, they are always a help when I am in need.

Today not tomorrow is what determines who you will become! 

Love, Your son, Elder Paxman

A HUGE Monologue

Dear Mom,

The Indianapolis, Indiana Temple open house and dedication were announced this past week and Elder Paxman found out that he will miss it by 15 days. Yea I was really sad when I found out that I will miss all the temple stuff... Although it will be alright, it just gives me a reason to come back in August!!

We had a door bell ditching incident on Friday night at midnight.  I was very mad to say the least and if I hadn’t been alone would have ran the delinquents down.  I shared the whole story with Elder Paxman. The story was really funny, the little punk. Although, he is also lucky I wasn't there. I am not going to lie, but I am faster than dad and yourself, and I would run the little creep down. That would be getting off lightly.  Well next time that happens we will make sure it happens a little differently... I can't make a malicious face for I would :)  

Would it be alright if Brooklyn and guy her friends use your air soft guns? They may have already used them. ;-) haha Yea she can use my air soft guns. They all can, it doesn't bother me one bit. I am sure they will take care of them just fine. It made me laugh that she was the only girl.

How has your weather been?  Any changes or moisture? The weather has been pretty moderate; 30's most days, sometimes lower sometimes higher. No moisture what so ever. So that will be interesting later.

Did you get your small package and was everything intact? I did get the package so thank you for that. I am giving the book to the family tomorrow. So that will be really good. Everything survived in the package, so that is also good.

Did you have to go with the Seymour Elders to transfers or did they go alone?  Who is with Elder Porter in Seymour now? No they drove up on their own. So we just stayed and did the normal day things. Elder Porter is staying and Elder Baird is the new one. He seems great, very quiet, but that doesn't bother me.

How has the work been this past week?  Any good lessons?  The work has been pretty good this last week so I will address that later in the email. The teaching is going good, still slow at times, but better and we will keep improving if we can. We have had a few good lessons this last week and I will get to that a little later. 

We pray often that you will be able to find people to teach. Thank you for those prayers to find people to teach it helps us a lot.

Do you have a temple trip planned in the near future?  Will it be Chicago or Louisville?  It would be nice if you could attend the Chicago temple before coming home, since you already got to attend the Louisville temple. Yes so the Ramirez family is getting sealed in February, so hopefully we will be going up to see that.  It will probably count for my allowed temple trip for the last six months in the field. Then I will have one more chance to go sometime, and I am hoping that is with the Diaz family, if they are ready. We will probably go to the temple in Chicago with the Ramirez family because that is where they are from. So that should be really nice.

Any more service projects? I enjoy service and we are going to keep going and doing the wood chopping one. It was really fun, plus that way I can get better at it.

Do you spend a lot of time with the English Sisters and Elders serving in Columbus? We don't really spend a lot of time with the English Elders and sisters in Columbus. The only time is really P-day. Some times on other occasions, but it is very very rare. The Seymour sisters usually come up on P-days, but with the current mileage situation I doubt that, that is going to happen.

You mentioned having all the church films memorized, is that in English or Spanish or both?  haha yea I have seen those so much!!! I watch them in both, mostly Spanish so I have them memorized in both languages, it makes me laugh sometimes. It can makes thing fun sometimes when we joke around and laugh about being able to say the words before the actors do.

Thanks again for all the prayers they really do help us so much. Well this week has been really good. So there have been a lot of good stories this week. Elder Ryan and I had a really good heart to heart, where I hope I helped him see a few things and one of which is what I will be talking about a little today because it was the same topic that came up with a LA (less active). So we were coming home from church on Sunday when I felt just a twinkling of a thought to go by a LA that lives nearby. She has always been very friendly to us, but never really let us in for a lesson. So we knock and she answers the door.  We of course were smiling and she was smiling and you know we exchange pleasantries. So we first start talking about working out and stuff, because she is doing those things and so am I, with the whole 6 months to sexy thing. (Which by the way is a lot harder than it sounds). So we kept talking and she said something that caught my attention. It was something insignificant, but we talked about it a little. I felt then to ask her a few questions, which I did. Trying not to pry at all, but just very loving and concerning. During our conversation it got around to her telling us about some of the trials she had been having and how she has been exiling herself. I won't go into a lot of detail with that because it is not my place. She also shared some more emotional issues that she has, more along the lines of depression. Now I don't really think I have ever suffered from depression really, I don't know I usually find myself a pretty chipper person. Anyway, she says give me a second goes inside and grabs a coat. (good sign it means she is going to talk with us a while, we didn’t have our coats, coming straight from church. I was in a sweater and my suit.) So she steps out (also because her husband isn't home.) and we start to talk some more. It comes to the point where the spirit was incredibly strong, and we kept giving her advice from our own experiences. I told her, you know that is truly what we do as missionaries, we try our best to help others and bring joy into their lives, I said the way we do this and have it for ourselves is through our savior. Now more onto the part I am going to focus on also as my spiritual thought. We kept talking and the spirit was so strong!  Lessons like this one, where the spirit is so strong are the reason I came back, the reason I am doing this in the first place (along with a thousand other reasons as well.) Anyway we kept talking and offering her help about feeling alone and depression and things of that nature. Until I felt so impressed to leave an odd commitment and give her something. It started with something more like this. "You want to know something, one thing that helps me get through the day, it is of something of extreme worth to me. Something so small yet so powerful” I then pulled off my missionary tag on my shirt. I said “this little piece of black plastic means more to me than many things in this world. It has brought me more happiness than I can think of, along with many trials and sorrows. I have fought for this since I was a young boy, and I have even fought for it twice. You know I want you to have it." So I gave her one of my tags. I told her that in my mission and in my life, the tag has helped me in so many ways. I told her that I have seen my fair share of trials, haha, but that my mission has brought me hope and something to fight for. She took it and asked, "How have you stayed so positive through all of this, through all you have been through?” I wish I could just get inside your head, and see how you think and what you are thinking." I then said do you want to know? She said "Yea". I than said "right now three things are in my mind. First off it is butt cold out here, we laughed. (Remember this is like 6:15 at night and I don't have a coat) Then I said second, I have the wonderful opportunity to be standing here talking to a wonderful daughter of God right now. And third, I always know when I feel down at this time of night I can look up and see my absolute favorite star. That is the gist of what I am thinking." I went on to elaborate about how knowing that, that star (Vega by the way) is there I feel a sense of belonging, a sense of peace and awe at the marvelous world we live in. I have been blessed with a love of the outdoors. This is one of the reasons for that, it allows me to know of the great love our Heavenly Father has for each one of his children. Along with many other things as well.

I continued. (Now this next part is both from the discussion with Elder Ryan and also the LA). I said that the tag has a varying value. It is only really worth as much as we give it. It only means something to those who fight for it and desire it, with all their heart, might, mind and soul. Now the tag I wear on my chest has a lot of symbolism and meaning to me, so it would take too long to get into too much depth. Although every day I wake up get ready for the day and place that tag on my chest. Now after the mission and during my little "Vacation" as many call it. I will not be literally putting on a tag. But that does not mean it will not be forever ingrained on my heart!! The little tag I wear shows I am a worthy servant of my savior Jesus Christ. You look at a missionary name tag and several things stick out. One is the missionary’s name, the biggest thing on the tag. Usually engraved into it. This to me is a symbolism of how it should be not just a tag, but a feeling we keep in our hearts at all times. Our name is the name of those gone on before us; we carry their legacy; so make them proud of the deeds you do while wearing their name, for it is theirs as well as yours. So cherish it with pride. Second, is the Saviors name, showing who we are here to represent, and who we have with us always. Now why is our name bigger than His?  We are not more important or better in any way that is for darn sure. No, I believe it is because you are the one wearing the tag, you are his messenger. You are chosen by him to do his work. "Every soul is great in the eyes of God!" Including and maybe especially yours. Sometimes we will not teach hundreds and baptize thousands, but it will be of no import, if we can say when all is said and done, I did what I could, and I have him always with me. He will forever be on my heart, just as he was for those two years or 18 months, and for some even shorter. This tag that we missionaries wear better mean a heck of a lot to them, for it does to me! And if it doesn't... Change that; make it worth more to you. You don't even have to have a missionary tag to make it worth something in your own life. For we should all be wearing the Tag of Christ on our hearts. For every member a missionary, and "I will not leave you comfortless; I will not fail thee nor forsake thee," rang the words of the Master. So for me although my time to wear the tag is slowly (yet lightning fast) coming to an end. I hope to have it forever on and in my heart. So that when "Some poor fainting struggling seaman" crosses my way, I may be the lower light for him.

I have so much more to say on this topic because I feel so strongly about it. But alas I have already written a huge monologue.  So I will close. I love you all so much and hope that this week is an amazing experience for us all. Remember that men are that they might have joy. There is always something to smile about and be grateful for. I know it for I have felt it. I love you mom and I hope that you and everyone else enjoys this letter if not... well too bad I already wrote it! 8P hahahaha have a great week and thank you again for all you do.

Love, Elder Paxman

Haz lo Justo

Elder Paxman and Elder Ryan at Christmas.

I think Elder Ryan took this since his dad posted it and I stole it. :)

Dear Mom,

I liked the quotes, because they were in the CES devotional and we got to watch it with the Nehrings which was really nice. I needed that message.

How is your health from last week? I am feeling pretty good. The medicine has kicked in and is working well.

Did you need House of Glory in English or Spanish? I should have clarified, the book should probably be in English. The members both speak Spanish, but one of them speaks English better than Spanish. The book is for the Ramirez family, an amazing family I am close to out here and they are going to attend the temple and get sealed here this next month. I thought reading the book might be helpful, it was to me.

I read you are having severe Ice Storms.  Have these affected you, how is your weather and are you staying warm? The weather has been really cold. We had an ice storm, but it hasn't affected us much at all. So other than just being really cold sometimes we are doing pretty good. I am keeping warm and love the scarf you gave me for Christmas, although sometimes I have no idea how to wear it so I feel kind of goofy, plus they have never been much my style, but hey when you are cold, you just don't even care. This morning it was misting and super foggy so that was interesting, other than that like I said just cold.

I shared with him an experience that had me crying in singing time in Primary. Bahahaha mom, you just can't keep it together anymore can you?! Well I can't judge too much, I am a boob too. Most of mine though are in quite moments of pondering or prayer anymore. Hahaha plus Wes is a cute little bugger. I like your sunbeam stories, hahaha that is a really cute comment about them looking just like Jesus. I really like little kids most of the time, when they are not little demonios of course.

How are your District Leader responsibilities going? Have you been to any of the Mission Leadership meetings? How is Carlos doing since his baptism?  How is the teaching of B by the Seymour Elders? Being DL is not too big of a deal. Although this last transfer with all the crazy stuff we didn't really have to do much. Most District meetings were cancelled. Although, I like it so far. Someone teased me the other day that here after this transfer I will go ZL.... I looked at them and said yea right... That would scare the tar out of me... Anyway on to happier thoughts.

The Seymour Elders are doing good. Elder Wright is leaving and Elder Porter is staying. Of course my companion and I are staying together. So that is awesome. Carlos is doing amazing and is still coming to church despite many of the struggles he has faced lately. Bertin, they are having a hard time contacting him still. Although we found out his mom has cancer, unfortunately sometimes those types of things become another incentive to listen to the gospel. I hope he is doing alright. I have been to one leadership training, when I got put as DL and it was a special situation.  We did go to a trainer/trainee meeting which was awesome.

WHAT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Elder Cozzens is engaged!!!!!!!!! That is freaking crazy!!!!!!!!!!! My trainer is engaged!!!!!! That is mind blowing he has only been home like 6 months!! IF that!! Man I feel super old mom, both in and out of the mission.

I told him that his dad had read the B of M, the New Testament and the D&C all in one year this past year and that I thought I might try it. Yea Dad told me! That is awesome! I am trying to read all the way through the Old Testament before the end of my mission. I am in second Samuel right now so we will see how it goes. Plus I really like the story of David.

How is the work?  Any luck finding investigators? The work is going slow as far as investigators go. We still haven't really found any so we are going to keep trying and expand our horizons. Yes we are really praying and fasting to find. I know He will guide us to those in need, for He has done it for me in times past.

You seem to love the branch there, have you grown close to many members? Yea I feel as I am close to a few families here in the branch. There are about 3 that I am very close to.

What has your daily schedule been like the past little while? Do you spend much time tracting? The past few days as far as the mission, we have been teaching members and doing service for the most part. So that has actually been very nice. It is hard to say a typical day, we try and do a few different things. One is knocking yes, another is less-active work, another is member, another is listing and a bunch of other stuff. So we just do what we can. We are trying right now to find the most effective way to find people.

Last week you mentioned having to translate Dr. Seuss.  What was that for? That was for sacrament meeting and for a member who was giving a Christmas talk, it was freakishly hard! Hahaha kind of fun though I thought.

As far as stories go, One that is kind of funny is watching church movies with my companion. I am old enough on the mission to have literally most of them memorized. So now I quote them and exaggerate and do funny things while watching them during breaks or whatever. I get my companion laughing a lot that way, so it is kind of fun. For example like the Testaments, we spend most the time laughing because of some stupid comment I make or something. 

We also went and split some wood for a member. My companion used to do it back home, so he knows how, and Brother Creasy, the member, has been doing it since he was little. So I tell them I kind of know how to do it, but not really. So they hand me the maul and put probably a 2 feet in diameter log in front of me and say we will teach you. Yea a lot harder than it looks, my arms are still a little sore, and we did that on Saturday. That is one way to make you feel like an idiot though, here you are swinging this ax at this freaking humongous log and getting nowhere and then he comes up and says let me show you.  He takes about 8 swings and the thing goes flying into two pieces. Although in my defense, he did have to use a wedge. So yea now I feel very week compared to most other people... So we are going to be doing that more, one because it is service and two so I can get better at it so I don't feel like such a nerd.... We got some good laughs out of that one. So yep that was most of the adventures from the rest of the week.

So now onto the more spiritual stuff, one thing that has become clear to me, is a change I have made between the first mission and the second. It was this; I never did tell people much about my background on the second mission. They do not know many of my trails or experiences. That was something I feel like I used more in the first mission. Well I have made a commitment to change that. I remember growing up I wanted to live my life in such a way that when I was older I could tell people stories of the "Marvelous adventures of Benjamin Paxman!" I stopped doing that though when I got back out. I was curious why... So I spent some time thinking and the answer to me was, simply that I didn't share, because I didn't care to share. I have learned that many people would rather hear a personal testimony through a story than only through the scriptures. Heck I am one of those people. So I have gone back to using that more. I realized that throughout my life some things have happened. I have done some freaking awesome things, I have done some ridiculously stupid things, and I have experienced the Hand of God in such abundance. Not to lessen anyone else's experiences, but I feel that my life has been directed of God more than even I myself have realized. I have fought for many things in this life; to go on a mission, to stay on that mission, to go back on that mission, and to influence the lives of those around me in any way I can. It is funny; many people think that when a battle is lost, we might as well give up... I have lost many battles in my life, and I am sure there will be many more I will lose; but losing a battle does NOT mean losing one’s salvation or ones goals. Maybe an example to illustrate my point;  I fought to stay on my first mission, and still  because powers outside of my control I lost that battle, but I would not have had the amazing spiritually growing experiences of fighting to make it back if it were not for going home in the first place! Losing does not mean defeat, not unless that is what you choose. We are free to act for ourselves. Happiness is not thrust upon us in this life, but found by those who seek it! If you want something truly and deeply enough you will do whatever it takes to find it. For me one was knowing for myself, despite all, that I was worth something more than a large medical bill and the accompanied sorrow. Now I am not saying that I am not worth something to others or myself, but in my experience it has been the hardest to find worth in my own self. It is easy for me to see the goodness and potential of others. But I have fallen into the pitfall that many of us often do, which is thinking the atonement and other gifts from God are for everyone else and not ourselves. We must remember the scripture, “And he shall go forth, suffering pains and afflictions of every kind; and this that the word might be fulfilled which saith he will take upon him the pains and sicknesses of his people. And He will take upon him death, that he may loose the bands of death which bind his people; and he will take upon him infirmities, that his bowels may be filled with mercy, according to the flesh, that he may know how to succor his people according to their infirmities. Now the Spirit knoweth all things; nevertheless the Son of God suffereth according to the flesh that he might take upon him the sins of his people, that he might blot out their transgressions according to the power of his deliverance..." We then are like yea that is so true, he takes care of everyone's sins and transgressions, but not mine. This is a sad thing, and I have suffered from it so much, and there may be more times where I get this mentality. Although I know he did all of these things for US and that includes ,myself and everyone else. (or whoever reads these/those words!) So remember that all the blessings promised are yours as well. Not just everyone's around you. Everyone is a beloved son or daughter of God, and if you don't know that or are not sure, you have been invited to find out, by many church leaders and prophets and now by me who is one of the least of these. Well that's my spiel. I love you so much and I hope you have a great week you are in my prayers daily and thank you for everything you do for me!

Love, Elder Paxman

Haz lo Justo!!  I love it so much better than Choose the Right!

Eche le gannas

Sorry this post didn't get done until today, Sunday.  We didn't receive email from Elder Paxman until Thursday and then I was busy, so the only thing posted was the title.

Dear Mom,

Ha ha, okay so first sorry for the scare, didn't mean for that one to happen. Second you gave me a heart-attack I get a call from Dad for what I think is no reason. I was thinking someone was dying or in the Hospital or something like that... Way to have me freak the crap out! Okay so now actually back to the email.

Sorry for not emailing until today (Thursday) on Monday I was really sick. This past week besides getting really really sick, wasn't too bad.

How was church, is your church always during the same block or do you change each year, and do you always translate? Church was really good this last week, it was fast Sunday which I love, but at the same time, it kills me. So we have church at 2-5!!!!! Which kind of stinks, but it has its benefits. One good thing about this past fast Sunday was they had a break the fast which was really nice to have. I usually do translate every Sunday, unless there is no need for translation, and then I do not. I don't mind translating it isn't too bad. Although like a week ago or so I had to translate Dr. Seuss!! That is like trying to translate baby-talk into Latin!! Nigh impossible! hahaha I managed though.

Do you feel you are finally fluent in Spanish? I wouldn't say I am fluent in Spanish, but I can usually speak my mind. Although, I am trying to learn some more conversational Spanish and some of the grammar a little bit better. So yea I am hoping to keep improving it so I can do well in it later. Then maybe try picking up another language, probably one of the tangent languages. I think it will be French for me.

I told him we had gone and seen Into The Woods at a theatre with recliners (I sent him a picture) and had Cheese Dogs at Hot Dog on a Stick. I saw the picture of the theater it looks and sounds freaking awesome!! We will have to go sometime when I get back! Into the Woods is pretty good. I might have to see that one when I get back home. Hot Dog on a Stick.. Oh yeah!!  Dad and I were the ones to introduce the cheese dogs to the family! They are amazing!!! I could go for one of those right now, with some of their lemonade too!

His cousin called us asking for ideas in catching a mouse quickly and killing it. bahahahahahaha The mouse thing was pretty funny. Don't they have a cat? The cat is what they should use for catching the mouse.  Traps I think are the best way though. I am glad you extended that invitation though. How are they doing by the way?

His aunt, my sister is going to be getting married and will be moving back to Utah after almost 20 years of living in Las Vegas. That will be weird for her to live in Utah, but I also hope everything works out with her new marriage! Although if it is with the same guy who has the daughter, there goes that potential out the window bwahahaha ;)  Good for her though.

Brooklyn had her first hand hold.. It’s a long story.  Wow, first hand hold, I don't even remember when mine was. Actually nope yep I do, and it is a really funny story I don't think I have ever told anyone in the family. I have told it on the mission though. It is really funny. I always assumed if you held a girls hand it meant you liked her. Then again, people said I was always the more chivalrous type. The little Twerp better be glad that this happened while I was on my mission, if not, I would have an empty bullet casing hanging around my neck with the name T.P. engraved on it!!! I would be out for real blood if Brooklyn was kissing on the boy, I would skin both of them... ALIVE!!!!! Although let this be a warning to any young man with his sights on Brooklyn Paxman.  I may be over a thousand miles away, but I have friends in high places, I will make your life a living nightmare if there is any funny business!!!! Let it be known that in 6 months’ time, I, Elder Benjamin Paxman, then just Benjamin Paxman, will violently scalp any young man who messes with my sister, and that will be if the pre-mentioned youngster gets off lightly!!! [8-{(  Juan is watching you!!

Anyway on to lighter material hahaha ;)

The work has been quite frankly really rough. We are struggling trying to find people to teach. Although this Tuesday we have some promising lessons and tonight another good one, so we will see how things go. We are really working on finding people, we fasted to find people to teach, and now we just got to keep trying.

So did I ever tell you how the puppy story ended? Well Guapo the member we were watching the dog for. (who is the Nehrings oldest son) came and got the dog. Well after the first night he discovers he is allergic to the thing and gives it away!!! So I watched some monster of a puppy for 5 days only to have it be given away!! Yea that was an interesting conversation!! hahaha I love dogs, but I stand by the White Handbook of God which states that missionaries are to not have pets in any form! I agree thank you very much!! So a few days ago Guapo shows up again with his kids. One of his little boys says "want to see our new dog"... WHAT!?!?! You got rid of the first one to get another! Well it turns out the dog is a husky a really beautiful dog that followed him home. The dog didn’t have a collar or anything so he tried to find the owner to no avail. Luckily we didn't have to watch this one. Well about two days later he comes in and mentions that he no longer has that dog either! Turns out he lost the lost dog... Don't even ask. hahaha so that was kind of a funny story. Although, it is hard to explain over email and probably something you had to be there for.

Are you and the companion still getting along great? Things are still great with the comp. I feel bad with being sick a bit lately. I hope he is managing okay.

Did you make new goals or New Year’s resolutions in the mission? We did make new goals. One of mine is being 6 months to sexy!!! I must do it! hahaha  We made a few others as well. Transfers are in about a week. We will/should be staying together to finish Elder Ryan’s training, and like you said, we will then have to separate. I have really enjoyed serving with Elder Ryan. I hope he has liked it as well. Those are worries I have with every companion though. You always hope they enjoy serving with you as much as you enjoyed serving with them. haha

Pictures this week?  Sorry, no picture this week, I don't have a way to send pictures I need a card reader or something to be able to do that.

So now for the spiritual story of the week. So this week I have actually learned a ton of different things. It is really hard to just talk about one. Plus I do not have a ton of time left so I have to make it kind of short. So some thoughts I have had, have been about sufferings, temptations and challenges in this life. All of us are called to suffer through a few things in this life. It is simply part of life. Some are called to suffer through more than others it seems, but to all it is hard in its own right. No one is better because they have suffered more. Lately, I have been thinking of why in my young years of live, well relatively young, why my life has been the way it is. I firmly believe that we are all called to pass through hard things in this life for our benefit. I know this because I have experienced it. A thought I have had lately is sometimes we are called to suffer so that further on in the Journey we may help some other poor soul who is suffering. We suffer and struggle not only for ourselves at times, but for those who we are called to aid. I have recently remembered many of my trials that I have had in this life, and how they have made and helped me grow. I am so thankful for them in every way. I am so grateful for the trials and challenges we pass through, not because we wish for them or desire them, but because they make us stronger, which in turn can help those around us become stronger. I have decided to share my past medical trials, especially with more people, as well as other experiences in my life. I remember once someone telling me that sometimes the only Bible people will ever read is the story and legacy of your own life. Or in other words the book of Benjamin for my case or the book of whom ever you may be. So that was profound to me. So I hope to heed the Saviors council when He talked of letting our light so shine so that we may be the light for those who still may be in darkness. So don't be afraid to share your life, the struggles and blessings with those around you, it will bring blessings as you have never seen. Not only in your life, but in the lives of those you touch. I know this because I have seen it and felt of it for myself. I love you so much and hope that you have an amazing week!! You will hear from me probably again on Monday so things will be back to normal. Love you all and Eche le Gannas!

Love, Elder Paxman 

P.S. “Eche le gannas” translates to “throw the desires”. So go chase after your dreams and live the best you can kind of a thing. And Kia Kaha! (Forever Strong)